What is wrong with me?

My grandmother died. I have cried over Jim Ammenhauser's son quite a bit, but hardly at all over losing my grandmother. I miss her, though she was a pain in the ass. I miss her every day.

First, why am I compelled to watch "I'm a celebrity. Get me out of here!"? The show sucks, but it's like the car wreck on the Interstate -- you just gotta slow down and rubberneck.

Next, is it totally wrong to want your landlord to fall off the ladder on which he is working to clean out your gutters? I have two fantasy scenarios: a) I save his life after he lay dying after falling off the stupid thing (and forever ingratiate myself to my landlords); and b) he dies and I get to buy the house that his wife wants to unload.

I'm going to hell.