Been A While

Short and ... well ... uninteresting?

I learned something new about MS this week. I've felt like crap for the last week. I've been really dizzy. My massage therapist noticed that my sinuses were really stuffed when I saw her last Friday. Funny, I didn't notice. By Monday, I felt like I was at death's door. I saw my regular doctor (Dr. Katula is just awesome, I must say). He said I had a sinus infection and that's where the dizziness came from. Well, after 4 days of antibiotics, I was feeling worse, not better. I called my neurologist -- turns out that my explanation "dizzy in my left eye" made a whole lot of sense to him. I'm sure he's heard it all by now, of course, but I still felt stupid. After talking to him, I feel better (emotionally, anyway). He explained that any infection will exacerbate previous MS symptoms. Thus, the "dizzy" in my bad eye.

Anyway, I haven't really been able to read well because of the dizziness, but I did manage to finally finish Beloved. I found a great piece of literary criticism entitled, "Why I Hate Beloved." My thoughts exactly. I realize that my mother is very right about saying that her mind is precious. What she chooses to put in her mind is very carefully screened. For the rest of my mother-fucking life I am going to have these horrible images in my mind.

Toni Morrison is a great writer because she did what I admire most about an author -- she drew me a very clear picture. I am a visual person -- the images I have in my mind from that book will haunt my life. I have previously chosen not to read this book -- I would never have opted to pick it up. But thanks to the powers-that-be at NIU, I had to read it. Fuck them!

I am behind, of course, in my preparations for comps. Tomorrow, I start Absalom! Absalom!