I Should Be Writing My Last Paper

I'd like to talk about the medical fields of oncology, neurology, and, while I'm at it, EENT (Ear, Eye Nose & Throat). What would happen if we cured cancer? The U.S. economy would crumble and descend into mass panic. Why? Because every oncologist in the country, every nurse dedicated to the care of cancer patients, every hospital orderly working in a cancer ward -- would be out a job.

And MS? Every neurologist and neurology nurse -- and then lets talk about the drug stores -- they would no longer need to carry walkers, canes, etc. Of course, there's always another disease.

Let's talk diabetes. How much would the economy suffer if we didn't need insulin? Or podiatrists? Or Opthamologists? Or blood monitors? Special shoes? Needles to inject insulin? What about all the oral medications?

And even the common cold. No more Theraflu, ColdEase, Robitussin, Nyquil (except for alcoholics). A reduction in the need for Kleenex (no matter the brand name). Vicks Vapo Rub? Cough drops? At this point, would we even need a drug store?

And people wonder why we haven't found a cure. We pour millions -- billions, I'm sure -- into the economy to "research" and "treat" the symptoms of these diseases. Of all of these, the only real cause seems to be cigarettes???? Can I just say -- bullshit! Yeah. Cigarettes suck. I hate the fact that I still smoke. But fuck -- what sucks even more is that there are so many sick people and there are so many people who would "suffer" if we found a cure for the sick people.

I hate this shit. Now I know why Jeff is such a cynic. I am starting to do more than simply sympathize with him. Now I see a plethora of conspiracy -- they are all conspiring, (I'm really not sure who "all" is, but work with me here, I'm on a major stress roll here) to make sure that America -- that the world -- stays sick.

In the words of Eric Cartman, "You bastards!"