Virginia Woolf

Apparently, she and I are going to become much better acquainted this term. I've already read Orlando and A Room of One's Own. Also on the syllabus is The Voyage Out, Three Guineas, The Waves, and To the Lighthouse (coincidentally, a few years back I asked for a collection of critical essays on Mrs. Dalloway and I was given a collection on The Waves and To The Lighthouse, instead -- gonna come in handy now!).

We are also reading Lytton Strachey's Emminent Victorians, something on the artists of Bloomsbury, a book about Virginia Woolf and Vanessa Bell (as sisters), Forster's Howard's End and Vita Sackville-West's All Passions Spent -- and God -- I don't know what else -- these books cost me something like $200 -- most of which I got used at the bookstore. Wow. The books (4 of them combined) for my other two classes (including my Shakespeare Textual Studies taught by the librarian I love so much -- brilliant man -- and the short story class with the nicest and easiest teacher on campus) only cost me about $100.00. I hate the textbook racket. They all suck. If I could only get on top of it one semester -- I took the time to check Amazon for all my books -- mind I got a 10% discount for being a TA at the Village Commons Bookstore -- Amazon would have been about $100 less including shipping! Even after my discount! Fuck me. I have no cash. Had to charge everything to my student loans.

Gonna be a busy term.

Finished my syllabus last night (nothing like waiting until the last possible minute).

Here's the latest medical update: I hope I'm imagining things. I'm seeing my doctor this afternoon and health services (for that long-awaited lyme disease test) Monday morning. I really think I'm just overreacting. The best I can explain it is that the left side of my face feels "tear-stained." You know, that kind of stiff skin/tight skin feeling your cheeks get after you've cried a long time. Okay, I cried a lot -- but I've showered several times since then -- come on. It's not droopy, it's not tingly, it's doesn't hurt, and it's not asleep. It just feels weird. I described it to one of my support group friends and he says not MS related. I suggested lyme disease -- he said probably closer. Bell's Palsy is Lyme disease more frequently than MS -- wouldn't this be a hoot! Optic Neuritis is usually diagnosed as MS, but can be misdiagnosed as MS when it's actually lyme disease.

I'm obsessing, I know. Nah. I am not going to get that "lucky." Bonus -- if it is lyme disease -- I would have had to have had it for some 3 or 4 years for it to go this far. Hmmm. Where was I that I would have been bitten by a tick 3 or 4 years ago? Hmmmm. This would be beautiful irony.

Irony with MS -- my elitist/snobbish attitudes towards "stupid people" -- well, perfect punishment from God.