I Really Did Ask for This

I wanted to teach -- to mold young minds -- to open their worlds to the beauty of literature. Uh huh.

Instead, I am pointing out comma splices, missing antecedents, fragments, and confused facts:

1. Winston Churchill is a great American hero.
2. I don't know who Roosevelt was but I'll be he was important.
3. Hitler and Churchill were good friends.

Then there is the occasional fun comment with which you just can't quibble:

1. The government needs to get their heads out of that "special place" of theirs.
2. And before you know it, you're hungover, broke and you don't know what the hell happened.
3. Drugs aren't just destroying the community, they're pretty bad for other people, too.

I asked for this.

I suppose I also asked for the 9:30 a.m. phone call this morning from "Toni," a troubed student with whom I was compelled to share my cell phone number. Toni has recently broken up with her boyfriend and she is not doing very well. She's an older student (about 24 or so) who made the mistake of following her grad-school boyfriend to the middle of DeKalb's cornfields. She knows no one; her parents are in Northern Wisconsin, and she got dumped.

"I tried talking to his friends but they just aren't telling me anything." Duh! They're his friends; they aren't your friends.

"But he promised this wouldn't happen." Yeah, promises, promises.

"I can't go on without him." WHOA! Hold up there. He's not worth it, Toni. How are your grades this term? Good? Well, then, how are your parents? Doing fine? Then, how is your health? Pretty good -- well you've got a leg up on me then. So, Toni, is it worth it? Is it this bad?

I didn't say this to her. I just thought it. The really funny thing was that I was moved to tears over her problems but not over mine. I will not and cannot discount her problems as trivial. She had no one else to call -- that alone is sad. She is a beautiful, smart girl -- great writer, good sense of humor, perfect body (bitch), stunningly gorgeous and brilliant. I hate her. But she doesn't have any real friends. That is so sad.

Her problems aren't trivial -- especially not to her. I've been there -- it may seem trivial to everyone else but it feels like the end of the world to you. What I am blessed with, though, that "Toni" is not, are the most wonderful friends anyone could ask for. I am so blessed. So as for the eye thing -- well, the Tarot said that there would be health concerns, but they would turn out to be nothing.

I suggest having Albina read anyone's Tarot, if for nothing else, hope to which to cling when things don't look so good. I think I haven't "reacted" yet to my "news" because I really trust Albina's tarot. She's never wrong -- or at least not very far off.

Besides, let's say, on the off chance that she was wrong on this health thing, it can't be too bad because I have the best friends in the world. They will see me through.